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Tara Mohr, an expert in the global leadership program for women, shares an inspiring leadership model in her book, Playing Big. This book is like a manual, where you can find guidelines on how to dispel all doubts, trust yourself, and get started. Tara has been working with women for many years and through her program helps them overcome mistrust in their own abilities and inspires them to lead. This book contains a wealth of information based on real experiences of both Tara herself and the women she has worked with.
The book talks about the biggest problems that prevent women from realizing their dreams. It is a voice of self-doubt and inner jugement, various fears and dependence on praise and criticism. And, according to the book, the best antidote is action.
“A voice of self-doubt that says, It’s not for me. It’s a voice saying you’re not skilled, smart or experienced, do not have enough of the needed qualities … to strive for more. ”
“Fear. Whether it’s the fear of failure, the fear of sticking out of the crowd, the fear of conflict or the fear of greater visibility, for most women, fear prevents them from expressing their voices and expressing their thoughts. ”
“Liberation from praise and criticism. Dependence on praise and avoidance of criticism keeps us from following the path we feel called to walk, whether or not those around us support and approve. Strong women are often subjected to hostile criticism, so we need to learn how to accept it and not let it paralyze us.”
The book introduces who that inner critic is and how to recognize it. It tells you where that inner critic draws inspiration from, and how it doesn’t get tired of repeating the same old broken record. It provides a table to make it easier to identify it, explains why we have it, and dispels the notion that it can still encourage us and be a tool for our improvement.
“The realist within us seeks to move forward. It looks for solutions. The walks in circles, considering the risks and the worst possible consequences.”
From inner critic to inner mentor
From an inner critic that spins the same old broken record about the fact that you can’t, you’re not smart, talented enough, and still unprepared to visualize your “future self”. Tara introduces exercises that help us discover a new voice – an inner mentor, who has helped women achieve impressive results.
15 ways to overcome fear
As the saying goes, what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. Yes, I agree. But there is another side to the coin. The painful experiences do tend to leave a mark. What hurt or injured in the past is stored in your brain and can be an obstacle in making current decisions.
“Every time we say our opinion, share ideas, try to change the current situation or change ourselves, we will have to overcome the fear of failure, criticism, rejection or even ridicule.”
Tara presents 15 exercises to overcome fear:
1. Call upon your internal mentor
2. Let love in
3. Get curious
4. Get into a positive state
5. Discover your desire to be useful
6. Talking to a younger self
7. Name it
8. Analyze what reality, opportunity, probability is.
9. Go back to the present moment
10. Follow the fear to the end
11. Breathe
12. Relax physically
13. Do an imaginative exercise or look for soothing images
14. Use music
15. Overcome fear
How many talented women are tangled in their own nets and, although they have all the necessary skills, stop themselves from realizing their dreams. It was very good to read the verses telling how they managed to realize themselves. This book encourages action, builds self-confidence, and inspires trust. I read for a long time – enjoying and analyzing, because I wanted to get as much from it as possible. I wish the same for you. If you read, then enjoy and take the time to “digest” the information.